GoodBye to 1-8-8!!! ~ Jully

Couldn't wait til tomorrow to write this, I've lost 5.5 lbs.
I actually walked home today, and said goodbye to 188, 187, 186, 185, 184, and 183...
Counting it down like that makes me realize how much weight that is and how much weight that is not.
Anyway, I'm finally out of the 188!!! I have been feeling great, but this just helps.

And I'm back! ~Jully

My session Saturday was great, it was good to get back in the groove of things. Shannon wasn't doing push ups off of one pinky finger, but apparently she did try to do a few hanging exercises on the cadillac during the previous sessions.
I had trouble getting my chest, neck, and shoulders aligned, but at least I was aware of it and did my best to get back to the main position. As always, I did my best to focus on the "core".

Sunday, I went for a 3 mile run on the threadmill at Metro - Golf & Fitness gym and today I wanted to go for a yoga class, but did the bike and the elliptical machine instead. After lunch today, I got a bit restless and actually went to the mall voluntarily. For the people who know me, this is unheard of. I was actually able to find a few good things (2 tank tops, 3 cotton shirts, 2 long sleeve shirts, 1 wool skirt, 1 pair of black pants), and spent a total of $60. My new rule is, it's gotta be 100% for me to commit to clothes (and possibly other things too...).

Being at home definitely makes things harder, the snacks all over the place and the bad habits.

I've been feeling really good here and there (almost too cocky), then I remember that I still have SUCH a long way to go, and I get back to reality. I've avoided the scale all this time, but Wed's session will show me if I'm finally out of the 188lbs mark. I may just get REALLY depressed if I don't.

While I was in Hawaii, I took some time to reflect about the past few months. I really had the right people around me. They're the ones that woke me up and kept me awake this entire time. I needed that big kick in the A__ and I'm glad I had the right people at the perfect time to do that for me. I am very grateful.

All it took was one painfully delicious meal ~Jully

Before my trip to Hawaii, I was very concerned about falling off the wagon, but I am very proud to say that I did ok.
Tuesday 1/6, I spent the day going from airport to airport and I had salads! I didn't get tricked into adding the potato chips, cookies, and all other things that "seem" harmless. I did good that day.
Once in Hawaii, things were starting to look troublesome. For breakfast, I got macadamia pancakes with fried rice! Oh, this thing was SO ABSOLUTELY bad, but SO good. For lunch, we had a nice salad at a spa, and for dinner we went to Allan Wong's (from Top Chef) restaurant. Each and every dish had an element of surprise and it was AMAZING. For my entree, I chose to have the beet salad, but that too was incredible. We had 3 sets of deserts, AND after that a piece of birthday cake.
The next morning, I felt incredibly gross. My friend and I agreed that we would have to split meals from this point forward, and so we tried.
All it took was one painfully delicious meal and I was all set for the rest of the trip.

I didn't use my pilates bands once, but on the first 2 days I did do the "hundreds".
I made sure to do an activity almost daily. I ran about 3x, hiked, surfed (or tried), swam, walked (the mall), and danced.
I truly believe that I was able to do all these activities almost painlessly because of pilates. My body was strong. I snorkled for 1 hour and didn't get tired at all. The "swimming" exercise did come in handy for surfing to thread water. The day after I was expecting my arms to hurt, but nothing.

This trip was very good for me. I am liking myself more and more. While shopping, if things didn't fit me, I didn't beat myself up. I just moved on and said, well not everything was made for me, right? While mingling at bars, I was able talk to men with more confidence. I didn't doubt or even question why would they even be interested, which is something I'd always assume.
I met some great people throughout the trip. It could have been because it was just Hawaii, but in any case, I was open and was excited to meet so many interesting and NICE people.
I am more sure of myself and have started to learn about my limitations. Well, I learned that I really can jump off a rock (1), snorkle in the deeper side of the shore (2), and venture to a deserted mini island (3).

(1)


(2)


(3)



I met an amazing hula teacher and during her lesson she told her students "You don't know your body, you don't know yourself. You have to introduce yourself, TO YOURSELF!".

My friend said that she's noticed a change too. "It's a new you", but we agreed that it's not a brand new start, it's just been a continous path to get me here.
I cannot wait to my pilates session on Saturday. I'm sure Shannon is doing push ups off her pinky finger by now.

Aloha!

Happy Jully Year!!! ~Jully

This will be the Jully year. I feel it. Of course, this is my way to remain positive and to let the universe know that I'm ready to be happy.

Let me share with you where I've been the past few days.

On Wednesday's session (12/31/08), my sister came with me to take a few professional photo shots. Unfortunately, we'll have to wait a little while to get them posted here. We'll have pictures for the equipment, the exercises, our Instructor, Shannon, and I. The bad part of this particular session was my anxiety of having to miss the next 5 sessions due to my upcoming trips. Virginia; my instructor, assured me that I would be fine. I am just really nervous to break my flow.

That same day, my sister dropped me off in Manhattan so I could catch a ride up to Vermont with a few new friends. On the way, she mentioned how my body had changed. "I saw you in your yoga pants, and saw that you have a butt now!" According to her, I didn't have one before. Watch out Beyonce!

For New Year's eve, we went to a bar around in West Dover, VT. There I started the night by standing still in the corner, but by the time the new year came along... I was jumping and smiling.

New Year's day was too cold to hit the slopes, but I did take a 40-45 minute walk uphill. It felt great to get out and not slack on the first day of the year. I was extremely fortunate that the people at the house were so nice, and also very health conscious. All the meals had close to 0 fat, and the taste was absolutely AMAZING! Three of the girls there actively participate on triathlon, and what's great about them is that they're just normal people. They were so encouraging, it felt great to be surrounded by such strength.

Something amazing happened on this day. When we went to the farmer's market, I noticed that I didn't have to pull my jeans over my belly. I usually pull my pants up every 3-5 minutes because gravity (aka my belly) just pushes it down below my waist. I know, it's not a sexy visual. But not on this day, it actually stayed there. It was an incredible feeling.

On January 2nd, I hit the slopes on my snowboard. The bad news is that I still wasn't able to get up forward on a downhill, but the good news is that I was able to keep up with the group without having them wait for me too long. It was a great warm up day of the season for me.

The next day, I hit the slopes for a full day. On this day, I really pushed myself. Not just mentally, but also physically. I probably fell about 20 times, which really means, I did about 20 1/2 push ups. My arms are still sore today, but it is very interesting that I naturally used my arms muscles rather than my leg muscles. In the past, my legs would have the sore spots, but not on this trip. It's really been my biceps and triceps. Interesting, right?

On the last day of the trip, I went for another 40 minute walk up the hill before we headed home and only had 1/2 of my pull pork sandwich and 3 bites of the most amazing macaroni and cheese. I was trying...

On Monday morning, I went over to the track expecting lots of people to be there due to the all the New Year's resolutions, but I was the first one on the track. There usually is about 4 people when I go, but it was just me on this day. Since there was a bit of frost on the ground, it was so neat to see only my footsteps on the empty track.

Today, I am headed to Hawaii. I am armed with running gear and pilates bands.

I am STILL grateful for all the support and encouragement I've been receiving from everyone. It truly feels fulfilling. I no longer see myself as the fat girl... The one who's afraid to go shopping because the stores may not have my size, the one who can't imagine running, rollerblading, snowboarding, hiking, biking in the Palisades and more...

Although I wasn't 600lbs, I ALWAYS felt like I was in that category. Just felt completely helpless, hopeless, and blind. Now, I am probably still my 188lbs and I am just a bit bigger than the normal person, but now I'm excited of what's to come, to see what I can do for myself.

So, this is why I feel it's my year.

Feelin' fine in 2009 ~Shannon

Welcome to the new year everyone. 2009. My thirtieth year. I am excited by the new year because it is when you can reflect on the year that has passed and look forward to what is yet to come in the year ahead. I am so thankful for this opportunity to do Pilates with Jumping Frog and hope to reach my original goals set back in November. I have so far lost only about five pounds. However, I did my measurements again on Wednesday for the first time in about a month and a half. I am happy to say that my waist was -2 inches, my hips were -2 inches and my bust was -1 inch. Pretty exciting, huh? So, while the weight numbers aren't budging much, I see that there is a difference in my body size. I did not make a resolution for 2009. However, I did write a list of things I hope to accomplish, goals per se. First, I would like to do something creative once a day- whether it be write, draw, or take pictures. I was an art major in college and creativity is something that definitely feeds my soul, so I hope to do more of that in 2009. I want to make sure I contact my friends more often. I love my friends very much and they are valuable to me, yet sometimes I don't think my actions show that, since life gets in the way and I do not speak to them as often as I would like to. I also want to continue on my path to being healthier, which includes cutting back on the wine tasting and chocolates. I have an affinity for both and I know that it is holding me back a little, as far as my health goals are concerned. My number one goal for 2009 is going to be putting myself and my happiness first. Because if I don't love and care for myself, it is hard to let others do that. The Jumping Frog Pilates program has, and will continue to be, a very helpful and focusing part of my life. It is a time for laughs and exercise, but also for contemplative moments and hard work. Happy New Year- here's to health and happiness for everyone!

You're running? No weight change? ~Jully

I've been running 2x/week for the past 2 months and my weight has not decreased, not even 1 pound. I know people don't believe me. I almost think that without my nikeplus gadget, I really have no proof, except for my sweaty clothes. Granted my eating habit hasn't changed dramatically, but I don't eat hamburgers & french fries, actually, most days I have salads for lunch (and no, I don't have it with ranch dressing, cheeses, and any fattening items), I don't snack on sweets and I don't binge. So what could be the problem? My metabolism IS completely shot.

Let's see where this all started, shall we?
When I was in high school, I did slim fast for a few days, tried herbalife (aka shakes for meals), also I did Nutrisystem too (pre-packaged food). I liked Nutrisystem because I didn't have to go anywhere, just ordered the food and just had to eat what was given to me, but I just ended up eating more than I should have. My weight was probably in the mid to high 150's during that time.

While in college, I gave Weight Watchers a shot. It worked while I was committed to it, but it was difficult to go in and get weighed in (and talk about it, too!), work out just for 30 minutes, and keep track of the food. I also attempted to do the Atkins, but was not successful the 1st time around. My weight then was around 160 to 170's.

After college, I bloomed... and eventually reached 194 lbs. At that point, a doctor in Brazil prescribed a medication to suppress the hunger, and in exchange, all I had to do is not drink 2 hours before a meal, during a meal, and 2 hours after a meal. Now, for someone who drinks about a gallon of water with each meal, this was quite difficult, but I did it. I would lose several pounds per day at times, and reached 150lbs. I don't think I stayed there very long, maybe 2 weeks? The drug made me feel like a zombie, and I knew it wasn't something good, but it worked. Eventually, I decided to see if I could maintain the weight without the drugs. I wasn't successful. I gained 1lb here and 2lbs there, and in my mind I was ok with that, because I just wasn't 194 anymore. Before I knew it I reached 160's, then 170's and eventually 180's. But in my head, I really believed that I could always go back to 150, IF I really wanted to.

In my mid 20's I tried Atkins, and it was the perfect diet for me. I would have eggs, cheese, and hamburgers with no bun and no guilt. Within the 2nd day, I would lose 2 lbs. When I followed the plan, I would lose up to 14 lbs after 2 weeks. Of course, I had no idea how to maintain it after those 2 weeks, so i would gain it back, and then go on it to lose it again. In between, I also tried the South Beach diet, I was also a vegetarian for about 4 months, and I may also have tried the cabbage soup diet. Obviously, none of it worked.

In my 30's, I would just laid off the carbs and decreased my salt intake for a few days if I had an event to go to. This was how I managed my weight. The final diet that did it was the Lemonade fast (lemon juice, cayenne pepper, and maple syrup). I managed to not eat anything, but drink the lemonade for 10 full days. I really did feel great during and afterwards. I know it's hard to believe, but I did like it. My mind was clear and knowing that I didn't have to eat, or worry about eating was a great relief. I probably lost about 8lbs on it, BUT ... my body has not been the same since. To know that you can go 10 days without eating did give me a sense of empowerment, but... the weight came back, and before I knew it I was 194lbs again. Of course, my emotional state has gone up and down as the weight has moved up and down. Let's face it, that's really the problem to begin with.

Now, after almost 2 months of pilates and running 2x a week... I've not lost a single pound. So if you EVER wonder what yo-yo dieting can do... think of me. My body has grown tired of me playing with it. No liquids, no meats, no carbs, no eating... I'm not even sure if I can reverse the effects of the past 15 years of abuse, but I'm going to keep trying. It's all I can do.

Session 15 ~Jully

Today was my 15th session.
Virginia spent some quality time with just 'lil o' me.
A lot of her description of me in the studio can interestingly describe my personality outside the studio as well.
- I focus a lot of my concentration in making sure I don't do something wrong, rather than trusting myself.
- I don't really communicate and ask questions even when things seem a bit off, I just think I'm working through it.
- I am a little more confident compared to the 1st session.

Recently, I've been realizing more and more about myself. It could be the age, I could be where I am in life, or it could be what this experience has triggered. So here's what I noticed, I am not as confident as I think I should be. I am pretty afraid of the aspects in life that require taking ANY risks. Oh yeah, lastly, here's what my sister told me this morning, "You REALLY need to learn how to communicate better!".

I did do my run yesterday and I'm planning on going tomorrow too.
The eating hasn't changed much. That's fustrating to you too, right? Somehow I prefer going through 40 minutes of sweat and pain, rather then just eating less.

Ahhh!!! I'll do it! Soon...